Fine

I have been shattered
I have been Battered
I have been beaten
and abused
I withdrew upon myself
I didn’t want to feel
I shut my eyes
I built the walls
warm mortar and brick was laid
I was fine
I was happy
In the bed that I had made
and I blame you
for this lonely little spot
this tiny ache
upon my heart
you had to go and get my attention
You had to make me open my eyes
view a different perspective
and just as suddenly
you were gone
you were gone
I wanted to be alone
In my little hideaway
my little hole
I was never looking
It was all just a game
to relieve the boredom
I suspend from
everyday
And you walked in the door
what I was doing
I can’t say
I was half there
half away
and I offered no resistance
I wanted some place new
something different
and I did not know
It would lead to this
And I blame you
my walls were falling faster
then life ever knew
I told you things about me
that even I wasn’t sure I knew
and you shared some to
and I blame you
for this sudden indecision
this tiny little ache
you had to go and get my attention
deviate me from my perspective
make me feel you
as a person
and then you were gone
you were gone
I am left with dried mortar dust to settle
I will build that wall again
fill in any chinks or holes
I don’t want to feel again
there are too many Rabid people in this world
I will close my eyes
Drawn in upon myself
and have a promise
that again I will find
that peace
to be happy in the world
I make for myself
and I blame you
for making me feel again.